


Much Ado About Not Sure What

by slipshod



Category: Galavant (TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Buffoonery, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-18
Updated: 2016-12-18
Packaged: 2018-09-09 11:28:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8889079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slipshod/pseuds/slipshod
Summary: There's a quest.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bbcphile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bbcphile/gifts).



"I can't just say no," Galavant said, sighing and taking a seat in their modest seaside kitchen.

"Of course you can!" Isabella protested, waving a pan around in a way that would have conveniently reminded an observer of the pleasantly domestic life they had established together.

"He's the King!"

"Yes, yes, the One King to Rule Them All."

"Unite Them All, Isabella. Otherwise you're flirting with copyright infringement, and we certainly don't have room for legal problems in our budget. Do you know, we're not even paying our writers now."

"Yes, and shameful as that is, it doesn't mean we can just get drawn into a flimsy plot device with no real justification."

Galavant nodded thoughtfully. "But Izzy, the King--"

"He's not just the King, he's also your BFF. You could ask him to find someone else to do his quest."

"It's not a quest, and my friendship with him is all the more reason for me to help him out."

Isabella's face softened briefly. "What about our happily ever after? We're supposed to be working on our six--"

"Four."

"--Six children, not gallivvvv..." Isabella's eyes widened. "...vvorting around the kingdom on a quest."

"It's not a quest, it's only a .... Did you say gallivorting?"

"Leaving your wife at home, no doubt, striking out on your own, sowing your wild oats?” she pressed. Galavant looked shocked. “I don’t like to use your name as a verb; it just feels weird."  

"Would you not come with me? How am I supposed to do a quest by myself? What if I run into trouble?"

Isabella took a moment to hide a smirk, satisfied that he relied on her so. She was a badass, she reminded herself. "I suppose I would have to. But who's going to carry your gear? If you think I'm--"

"Hey guys!" Sid said animatedly, knocking on the door frame as he poked his head inside. "I've missed questing with you so much! Just popping in for a visit."

Isabella shrugged and went to bring Sid inside.

"This really is shockingly forced," Galavant observed.

 

* * *

 

The three set off riding north, staying close to the shoreline. The warm sea air invigorated them, and each tingled with a familiar sense of adventure.

“What a thrill it is to be back on the road,” Sid said. “Together again, just like old times. Just hopefully not for quite so long. So, where exactly do we start?”  

“Well.” Galavant frowned. “King Richard told me the whole story. I think he sang a song. Might’ve cried at one point. To be honest with you I kind of tuned him out.”

Sid rounded his horse on Galavant. “How could you tune out the quest?!”

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Isabella said pointedly.

“I only tuned out, you know, a lot of it. He went on for twenty minutes! I got the gist.”

“Okay, what are we looking for?” Sid asked.

Galavant squinted into the middle distance. “I want to say...maybe a scepter? Something like that. A magic wand. A baby rattle! No, that doesn’t sound right.”

A few minutes later, they were riding inland, toward Richard’s castle.

* * *

 

Later that day, they set out on their quest yet again, this time with King Richard in tow.

“Ah, it’s a good thing you came for me, Gal. Now we can get it done in half the time. And I, for one, missed being out on the road with my bestie. How about you guys?”

“AGAIN, Richard,” said Galavant, “you really needn’t have come. In fact, it’s not too late to turn back if you fe--”

“No, no,” Richard said comfortingly. “You need me. It’s okay.”

Galavant risked a guilty glance at Sid, who, as he suspected, was glaring at him.

Isabella, who felt mollified somewhat by Richard having to participate in his own damn quest, rode high. “It will indeed be easier having you with us. After all, you know what we’re looking for.”

“As does your dashing husband!” Richard replied. He reached across Isabella’s horse--improbably far, really--to chuck Galavant under the chin. “I described it to him in great detail. And where to start looking!”

“Right! Well, I’ve led many a quest in the past but those days are behind me.”  Galavant cleared his throat awkwardly and Richard rode on smiling obliviously. “I would be honored if you would lead us this time.”

“Awww. You love me. Of course I humbly accept.”

“Well, that’s that settled,” Isabella said. “Where we headed?" 

"We're headed to a place where Gal and I have been before," answered Richard. "A place with a very creative people who once tried to form their own government."

"Oh, right," Galavant said. "I mean. Right you are."

Richard nodded blithely. "Aha, it was so cute. Unfortunately, from what I understand, a small number of them were not inclined to conform to the unification of all the kingdoms and part of the town had to be razed before those souls saw the light." He waved a dismissive hand in the air. "But, like I said, it was just a few of them." 

Sidney and Isabella shared disturbed looks. 

"Also, appropriately enough, where I was reunited with the love of my life, my dear Queen Roberta." 

"Ah yes," said Galavant. "How is Bobby?" 

"More beautiful every day! Ha! Remember that time Tad Cooper hid in her clothes while she was bathing in the lake?" 

"That was me." 

"You were in her clothes?" 

"What?! I meant--" 

"Ha! Gotcha. Ha ha! You should see your face. But yes, you're right, that was you. Tad Cooper bit your finger something fierce. I was just glad he didn't burn you." 

"I still can't believe that lizard is a dragon," Galavant whispered to Isabella. 

"You mean you can't believe that DRAGON is a dragon. Isabella, I wish you could have seen him when he got his finger bit! He didn't know if he wanted to cry or break poor Tad Cooper's neck." 

At this point King Richard sang a nostalgic song called "You Had To Be There," which detailed some of his favorite hijinks with his "Gal Pal" and left his compatriots in various stages of confusion. 

Galavant, who of course Had Been There, held up a hand. "How come I don't remember some of those?" 

"Yeah, man. You sleep-walk. I keep meaning to tell you that." 

* * *

 "Okay, squad! This is the spot?" Richard said, sounding as though he was asking a question. He had previously declared two other spots to be "the spot" in their effort to set up camp for the night, and he had been firmly rejected on both counts due to catastrophic and glaringly obvious infrastructure concerns. 

 

"Very good, sire," Isabella said politely. "And friggin' finally." She didn't bother to lower her voice. 

"Have you worked out what we're looking for?" Sid whispered to Galavant as they pitched the royal tent. 

"You know I haven't, and trying to get information out of Richard is like trying to get candy from a baby." 

"That's supposed to be easy," Sid pointed out. 

"What? No. Babies love candy." 

"Yes, but their grip strength is minimal." 

"But what if they start to cry? Who can resist their little baby faces?" 

"That's not the--" 

"What ho, travellers," came a melodic approaching voice. 

"What?" Galavant shouted back. 

"That isn't period-appropriate," shouted Isabella. 

The voice appeared as the leader of a band of travelling minstrels. "Are you on a quest? What ho!" 

"We seek the Royal August Scepter," Richard replied in his most sonorous voice. 

"Ah, see, I knew it was a--" Galavant said. 

"Which is in fact a baby rattle," Richard continued. 

"Damn," Galavant said. 

"It is renowned throughout the land," Richard continued further. "Perhaps you are familiar with it?" 

"We are indeed," said the minstrel leader. "In fact, not five days hence I made the acquaintance of a baker who made mention of it. He was on his way to Merriton to sell his wares. I'd be happy to take you there, only my band have recently fallen afoul of a bandit who stole our seven instruments." 

"Oh no, a side quest," Isabella breathed, horrified. 

"Damn," Galavant said again. 

Richard inquired about the instruments. 

* * *

 Several days and side-quests later, Richard had the rattle in hand, and was, of course, shaking it and laughing. 

"Ah, I remember holding this as a tot! Oh, that is a good time! I haven't felt like this since I was ten." 

It spoke to their level of familiarity with Richard that none of the other three bothered to question his continued use of a rattle till the age of ten, which is to say that they had all met him and therefore weren't surprised in the least. 

"So sire," Sid said conversationally, "Why the sudden need for an heirloom baby rattle?" 

"Surely Galavant told you our good news! Bobby and I are expecting a little mini-king or -queen in just a few months." 

Isabella and Sid didn't hesitate to voice their sincere congratulations, while Galavant offered up, "Really? I thought you said Roberta was older than you." 

"Wait." Richard slowed his horse and frowned at Galavant. "What the hell, man?" 

**Author's Note:**

> I ended on Richard saying this because it was one of my favorite moments of the whole series. 
> 
> Work contains an obvious Look Around You reference. 
> 
> To bbcphile: Hope you enjoy! I really wanted to write you a song, but it was a matter of logistics. Merry Christmas!


End file.
